Conversion and my family
Sophie was baptized yesterday at noon. I hadn't told my parents about it because I assumed my mom would be upset, and my dad would think I was deliberately trying to hurt him (of course). They found out anyway, and apparently my dad is harboring Hurt because I have not talked with him about my conversion in the way
he wants me to. When I first decided to convert, I wrote out my reasons and gave them to my parents, because I am shy and don't articulate myself well orally, and because I am simply incapable of speaking to my father face to face as one grown-up to another. My parents, however, have never read the written explanation--my mother, I think, can't deal with it, and my dad refuses to acknowledge it. So, there it is, this big Thing between us, and my dad is storing up all this Hurt that I have to feel guilty for--and as if I want to have a discussion with him after what ensued when I told him I had legally changed my name (refreshing you, he lectured me about it and took it personally).
I'm aching to have a good robust discussion with them about my conversion, because I feel sure they would see the logic of converting, just as I did, but it's not going to happen because of my dad's pride. My conversion did not happen, in his eyes, because I have not followed His Rules about discussing it with him. And my mom doesn't want to know--just like when I was a kid, she doesn't want to know, she'll run from the room and hide before acknowledging something she doesn't want to see. And why can't I actually sit down and orally discuss my conversion with my dad? Because he spent seventeen years training me not to disagree with him under pain of his anger. How can I possibly override that automatic response in one day, in one conversation? Does he even realize that HE is the reason there can be no conversation? And if I told him this, what would he say but "Why do you want to hurt me?"
Labels: conversion, family
Your period is optional
This really bothers me, and I don't quite know why. Is it because there is something deeply disordered about a society that views fertility as a curse? Because it's more of the sterilized, engineered society turning over its humanity to the vision of scientists drunk with their own hubris, a society viewing its unwashed, passionate, reckless ancestors as poor unevolved beings we are glad to have left behind for this brave new world? What are we becoming?
Give me life
Give me pain
Give me myself again
--"Little Earthquakes"
Labels: modernism
Planned Parenthood: Please shut up
When did Klan Parenthood . . . oh, sorry, Planned Parenthood, get a bishop's hat? :roll: I mean, who are they to preach on theology, unless it involves eugenics and forced sterilization?
Labels: planned parenthood
Sophie's going to get Christianized
So we finally made the appointment for Sophie to be baptized. The deacon who will be baptizing her asked how many people would be there for the event, and we laughed. Um . . . three, including us. How sad.
Anybody want to come? Please?
But then, I guess the whole Communion of Saints will be there to welcome her, so really it won't be such an empty church that day after all.
Labels: sacraments
